Got a sneak-peek at the first episode of the “new” American Gladiators. (Yes, the guys hitting each other with giant cotton buds.) It’s impossible not to cheer the contestants when the big bad gladiators are shoving them off the pyramid, or, you know, just showing overall mean-ness.

Is it just me, or are the new gladiators playing to their stereotypes too well? There’s this guy who looks like a wolf, howls like a wolf, and, well, is called “Wolf”; there’s this girl who talks with a dutch accent, wears one of those milkmaid skirts, and they call her “Helga.” (I could actually just go on and on, but, well, the show’s popping up the boobtube on Crime/Suspense this week and next week on Jack TV, so you better see it yourself.)

Hulk Hogan and Laila Ali host the show, and in-between challenges, they try to insinuate trash talk from the competitors. Slurred speech from the adrenaline rush and fatigue induced by “The Eliminator”? — You bet!

[MINI-GAME! Count exactly how many times you'll hear the words "14 years" during the first episode, whee!]

P.S.

I cras Dylan of the Peep Show!

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